Epic Pokemon Rap Battles
by BlastofSteel
Summary: Pokemon Rap Battles. What'd you expect? Over 12,000 views. Thank you for making this story my most successful fanfiction.
1. Machamp VS Conkeldurr

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

MACHAMP!

VERSUS!

CONKELDURR!

BEGIN!

**Machamp: **I'm the original bulky Fighting-type.

You and Hariyama can both get a life.

I was needed until this clown came along.

Who needs Mach Punch when I've got Seismic Toss?

Whether they're Flying, Bug, or Psychic, I've got 'em all beat.

While you're just swinging big chunks of concrete.

I'll rip out all your Guts using my Sheer Force.

Machamp is the 'Mon you just can't endure.

**Conkeldurr: **You've got four arms? It makes you look like a freak.

I may have a big nose, but you've got a fricking beak.

My Attack is higher, my Mach Punch pwns.

I'll Facade on you, son, if you don't watch your tone.

No Guard with DynamicPunch? I don't need to play that game.

Just blame your ability next time you hit a Hurricane.

I've got the D-Punch too, don't try to confuse me.

With my superior bulk I guess you're gonna lose to me.

**Machamp: **Don't call me son. I'm generations older than you!

I'll dodge your attacks and hit you back with a Vital Throh.

You learn Mach Punch as an egg move? Wow, that's great!

But you're still weak as h*ll, and a fricking lightweight!

Able to learn Focus Blast, there's no point in that.

When your Special is lower than a Spoink's Attack.

My S-P-D is high as crack, while yours is 65.

I can take a Hydro Pump, while you struggle with a Dive.

**Conkeldurr: **I'd kill you with a Stone Edge, but I take it easy on wusses.

When I roam around the route, legendaries hide in bushes.

I've put down my raps, like I'll do with your life.

Don't bring up weight, just drop your fork like I drop the mic.

{Gurdurr comes on stage to assist Conkeldurr}

**Gurdurr: **Conk, you schooled that macho chump!

He could use my Defenses. They're high 'cause I pump!

**Machamp: **Way to cheat Conkeldurr. You don't know how to rap.

So you sent Clowny Junior to do your defense crap.

**Conkeldurr: **If you insist, I'll do this solo.

Jumping full force in this battle, like "YOLO!"

No one uses you. Not even Youngsters!

So think about that next time you pick steroids from the drug store.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!


	2. Aggron VS Rhyperior

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON

AGGRON

VERSUS

RHYPERIORRRRR!

BEGIN!

Aggron: Come taste my Iron Tail you thug, I'll take an Earthquake from you, hit you back with a Stone Edge, and an Iron Head times two. I'm from the Third Generation, you're from Diamond and Pearl, I can take a Yveltal, you can't even punch a Poliwhirl. Toss you with my horn, a new type of attack is born, I splatter blood and gore, with my tremendous Roar.

Rhyperior: I shoot rocks from my hands right into your metal skull, you talk all this crap and you're too full of bull, you fool. My evolution is strong, he was alive on his own, up until I came and gave him the strength to pwn. You're so weak, you needed additional Steel Typing. Little did Game Freak know, you're 4 times weak to Rock and Fighting! You're slower than Bidoof, you big fat fake. You're more fit to rap against Ekans the Snake!

Aggron: How dare you talk to me like that, you fat necklaced freak! I'm the strongest in Hoenn, even for Sinnoh you're still weak. My steel armor will protect me from anything, everything that your raps can bring, will bounce off me like I used Fling! Step away, unless you want my Earthquake, when I romp around my region even Slaking and Salamence SHAKE!

Rhyperior: Fool, you can't beat anything that resists you! I've crushed everything, from a Groudon to Furfrou, From Kyogre to Sliggoo, From Arceus to Pichu, I can even crush Mewtwo! I'll be sure to smash you, too!

Aggron: You could smash me, I agree, with your enormously fat body. Heavy Slam's the only thing you got on other Pokemon. I'll be sure to smack your face in battle, send you crying to your mom.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE! (No, really, you seriously do! This battle was suggested by KillerBeatle908)

Thanks for reading! If you want to use this rap or anything, go ahead!


	3. Espeon VS Umbreon

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON

ESPEON

VERSUS

UMBREOOON!

BEGIN!

Umbreon: Before I let my harsh head-splitting raps fly, who do you thinks gonna win, a Psychic or a Dark-type? Obviously Dark, your attacks won't effect this cat, girl, I'll use Rap Pulse, make your pink body flatter, I'll pitch my explosive raps to you so swing batter, batter, I'll use Rap Slide make your body go splatter.

Espeon: Rhyming a bunch of "atter" words doesn't make you a good rapper. It just bores the audience, and it makes your flow crappier. You may have good defenses, but you can't attack for nothing, look at my Special offenses, they are immense, I ain't bluffing. There are billions of psychic cats, here to team on you, Go! Espurr, Mewtwo, Meowstic, and Mew!

Mewtwo: You wanna battle me? Well go ahead I dare. I've got two Mega Forms and an Aura Sphere!

Espurr: I'll stare you in the eyes, until you cry! Last 'Mon who fought me, well, guess what, he died!

Mew: I can transform into anything, even you! With my rap skills and your fast mouth, I'm sure you'll lose!

Meowstic: I'm different from male to female, but you're not! What? You're gonna try to kill me with Nasty Plot?

Umbreon: SHUT UP ALL OF YOU GO AWAY NOW! THIS IS BETWEEN ME AND ESPEON! YOU FAT UGLY COWS!

{Mew, Mewtwo, Espurr, and Meowstic all leave.}

Umbreon: Much better. Now continuing my rap...

Umbreon: You're so weak, you should belong to Ash! Maybe you'd be worth something if you could take a Night Slash! You're a helpless damsel in distress in Gates to Infinity! I'm the boss there! No denying it you kitty! If it was possible for you to actually take me, I'd go to Magmortar, put my head in his cannon, ask him to bake me! There's no standing your raps, cause all they are is just crap, now it's time to get rid of you! Weavile! Night Slash!

{A Weavile pops up and Night Slashes Espeon, who is holding a Focus Sash.}

Espeon: Hahahaha! You can't beat me when I'm holding a Focus Sash! With that incredible item I can take a critical Night Slash! You're afraid of me, that's why you tried to get me killed! While I'm outspeeding everything, you've got the fattest build! I'll admit this, you could take a couple hits til you're done. But when it comes to rapping, you're like TheJWittz with his puns.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by Girl with the Fireheart. Thank you, Girl with the Fireheart!

Please keep the suggestions coming!


	4. Pinsir VS Heracross

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON

HERACROSS

VERSUS

PINSIRRRRRR!

BEGIN!

**Pinsir**: Alright, horn-head, let's get this over with.

Because we both know in the end who's gonna win.

You've got one big horn? So? I've got two!

They're made for ripping epic fails like you.

I've got Mold Breaker so screw Levitaters

I've also got Guillotine so screw all the haters

Come at me, I can rip your head clean off, just like this! {Rips Ash's head off.}

While you stare in amazement.

{Heracross stares in amazement.}

**Pinsir**: I can see you're amazed, and surprised, from your eyes

So now I'm locked and loaded... say your goodbyes.

**Heracross**: Hey, there, eaten too much sugar punk?

You should calm down, and then shut the fudge up.

I don't care if you've got Guillotine, so stop its mention

It hits 30% of the time, I ain't feeling tension.

Go back to Kanto, we Johto'ers don't need you.

You say you can beat me? You couldn't even squash a Beedrill!

So just get out of my sight, and take the next flight home

And next time we battle, remember you can't beat stone

But I've got Close Combat, so I'm the better fighter.

You mad bro? I'm the better rap writer!

**Pinsir: **No, I'm not mad, or glad, or sad

You sounded like a drunk second-grader, with all the crap raps you had

I win you lose let's face it you runt

I've won this already, I squashed your nuts.

**Heracross:** Pff, you wish you could win, but you can't.

You've got anger issues, this is just one of your rants.

You're a big fat bug who needs an evolution!

I'll use Stone Edge, start the revolution.

**Pinsir: **With these short verse bursts, I'll Pinsir-slap your face!

It's quality, not quantity, your words ain't no race

Just stop spitting words at me because I DON'T GIVE A CRAP!

Now step aside idiot, and let me rap.

**Heracross: **I'm done rapping against a 4-year-old, see ya.

If you come at me again I'll throw you in a tree, yeah.

When you return to Kanto tell 'em all that I destroyed you.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by Raikou927. Thanks, Raikou!

We need your suggestions!


	5. Lucario VS Sceptile

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

SCEPTILE!

VS.

LUCARIOOOO!

BEGIN!

**Sceptile**: Smack you to your senses right before I start this rant.

Because you're half-asleep already and fight back you can't.

I'm the Grass-type starter of Generation III.

I'm based off a king, scepter, so bow down to me.

With my tree-climbing skills and throat-slicing blades,

I'll chop a neck off, that'll make your star fade.

I'm highly underrated everyone out there should here that

I'm a dinosaur-lizard, you're a ponytailed cat.

**Lucario: **You're just jealous of me, because, well,

You don't have a Mega Evolution, that ring a bell?

I've got a Steel-typing so your Grass-type moves bounce off of me.

I'd keep on rapping, but, I've got a sidekick to do it for me.

{Machamp steps in.}

**Machamp: **I pwned Conkeldurr before, I can surely beat a lizard.

After this you'll all call me the master rap wizard.

Sure, Conkeldurr, was an easy target, but still..

I'll fight you like I took Rap Steroid pills!

I've got four arms, you've got only two.

Which means I pack more of a punch than you.

Sure, Lucario should be rapping, but I don't care!

He hired me, ten bucks, so it's all fair!

**Sceptile:** Using a cheat like this, Lucario? That's cheap!

A rap like this would make a third-grader weep!

Ten bucks for a better rapper than you? What a deal!

But using him to win the battle? That's a steal!

Sure, I guess you have a Mega form,

but there's plenty of those, it's just the norm!

So before you go along saying that you're superior,

I've got a friend for you to face! Rhyperior!

{Rhyperior steps in.}

**Rhyperior: **I'll start this rap with my beast Horn Drill.

Unlike you, I can actually win at will.

You think you're so strong, with your weak Force Palm.

But the fact is, you got your facts wrong!

Go back to the Trainer's School, and get picked as a starter.

You think Earthquake's hard? Well my body's harder.

I know you think I'm kidding, but this is all really true.

Just ask Xatu, he can see the future for you!

**Lucario: **Well, I might be weak to Earthquake but not to your fancy words.

Before you try to attack me, just try rapping against the birds.

No one cares about you anymore, you're slow and weak to Grass and Water!

With my epic raps, I'll make this battle hotter.

I'll spit out a couple more lines, prove to you that I'm the best.

Now I'll start to diss the lizard, prove that he's just like the rest.

He's never used in battling, not even by dem desperate noobs!

I know you think you're gonna win, but it's not possible for me to lose.

Three more lines, after this one, I'm gonna have some fun, dissing you punks.

Just look at me, so happy and free, my raps flow, see, yours don't, gee!

I may look strange with my Mega Form,

but you looked stranger when you were born.

WHO WON? (Lucario and Machamp, Sceptile and Rhyperior)

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle suggested by PokemonXYFan104.

I like the suggestions a lot! Please keep them coming!

Next battle: Gardevoir VS. Gallade!

I know this battle came out a bit early, but I couldn't fall asleep. ;)


	6. Gardevoir VS Gallade

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

GARDEVOIR!

VERSUS

GALLAAAAADE!

BEGIN!

**Gallade: **Nice hair there, fairy, you don't got nothin' on a Steel-type.

But I am the greatest fighter in RU, you'll all go down the pipe.

I fight off Steel, I fight Poison, I fight Ghost,

But we all know which Fairy is nothing to boast.

You have a Mega? So? No one cares, you loser.

I'll hit you with my moves like I was in a first-person shooter.

There'll be nothing left of you when I'm finished with my attacks.

So come at me, you freak in a dress, I'm pumped up to max.

**Gardevoir: **You think you can attack

but you really can't do nothing.

I'm the Psychic Champion

Let me show you something.

I'm Fairy, you're Fighting, you're weak to me.

You're even weaker when I let my raps flow free.

So get out of the building, I've already won.

You don't seem to realize this battle is done.

**Gallade: **This battle isn't over until I squash your face.

It would have been done by the third line if that was the case.

With your Mega Evolution you look so fat it makes Snorlax look thin.

So go back to Hoenn with Wally, I'm going to win!

**Gardevoir: **I was Wally's only decent Pokemon, but no one likes you.

You're never used for high tiers only used for RU.

So I'll just keep rapping and doing what I do.

Which means I gotta keep smashing weak 'Mons like you.

**Gallade: **This is my third verse, and I'm still just beginning.

You're losing, just admit it, and I'm totally winning.

You're arrogant, dressy, and all-around dumb.

When a Poison-type comes we'll have some real fun.

**Gardevoir: **The reason I'm part Psychic is to destroy Poison creatures.

You don't seem to get that I've already beat you.

I'll stop rapping now, because of the Mercy Rule.

Dazzling Gleam on your Fighting-type, fool.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by Girl with the Fireheart. Thank you very much!

We need your suggestions!


	7. Charizard VS Blaziken

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

CHARIZARD

VERSUS

BLAZIKEEEEN!

BEGIN!

**Charizard: **ROAR! Come at me, fighter.

After this we'll see whose raps are better.

I'm Flying, you're Fighting, I'm tough, you're not.

Use Sky Uppercut, let's see what you've got.

I'll crush you, like I did to Gary's Blastoise, yeah.

Think you can beat me? Ha ha ha, nah.

I'm from Kanto, chosen most often,

Instead of Harden I guess you use Soften.

**Blaziken: **So you say, I guess you wish you could fight.

You battle like an Furfrou, all bark and no bite.

Your raps are as good as your Defense is.

Can't survive a Stealth Rock, let's not even mention Stone Edge.

I've got Speed Boost, I'm practically a ninja.

When I use my Brave Bird, you're not just gonna cringe, yeah.

I've got a Mega Form, that makes me look epic.

But as for you, you couldn't even beat a Tepig.

You were never used before Generation Six.

I put my rhymes in, show me some of your licks.

**Charizard: **I win, you lose, my Air Slash releases.

You scream "Light Screen!" but it tears you to pieces.

I've got two Megas, dork, I've got more in my arsenal.

I can set all on fire, I'll toss flame darts and all.

You might want to hide under a rock, you freak.

And you look real ugly with your huge chicken beak.

Get out of my sight, why don't you go back to your farm?

While I go to Charicific Valley, cause the other Charizards some harm.

**Blaziken: **What does Blaziken stand for? I'll tell you.

Blaziken Licks A Zealous Idiot, Kills, Eh, Nothing New.

There are two N's at the end but who really cares?

You're soft and tender inside go back to CareBears.

**Charizard: **Back off you wuss, I'm the Fire-type Chuck Norris.

I'll use my Dragon Rage to fling you back to the forest.

**Blaziken: **You think you're so tough, with your Dragon-type moves?

Well taste my Fire Punch, and take some abuse.

We all know the flaming chicken won this match-up.

Cause I'm a fearless fighter, you're as strong as a Machop.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

This battle was not necessarily suggested by anyone. However, one of you suggested Charizard VS. Talonflame, and another one of you suggested Blaziken VS. Infernape. As much as I loved these suggestions, I thought that Charizard VS. Blaziken would be an excellent match. Thank you for your suggestions!


	8. Kyogre VS Groudon

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

KYOGRE!

VERSUS!

GROUDOOON!

BEGIN!

**Kyogre:** We start with a Drizzle, then feel the Thunder!

Whoa! It doesn't affect you? Sorry, I made a blunder!

We'll use my Hydro Pump to send you back to your grave!

So stop rapping against me and rush off to your cave!

I make the rain come, and it helps people's berries grow.

You make the drought come, and it makes fertility go.

Only Landorus and I can solve that problem, you jerk.

So now it's time to make people's Wailmer Pails work!

If you're from Kalos, it's a Sprinklotad, but who really cares?

I'll crush you so bad, it'll give you nightmares!

**Groudon: **We start with a Drought, then taste my SolarBeam!

Oh! It's super-effective against you, it seems!

You're real easy to catch, everyone picks Ruby, bro.

I'm smashing you already, I wouldn't even call you a foe!

My Drought theme gives people headaches! It's because I'm powerful!

Your Drizzle is for wusses, y'know? It's because it's so not cool!

So really, I'd suggest that you just stop causing floods!

Get rid of the water, and use an attack that can draw blood!

Sure, I guess Water turns Ground-types to mud...

But I'll just dodge it, see? Your attacks aren't even close to good!

**Kyogre: **Need I remind you, you were controlled by Team Magma?

Their Mon's are so weak, you could sweep with a Slugma!

Magma and Slugma, they don't really rhyme.

But everyone knows that I'm killing it this time!

Your massive Drought was the biggest epic fail.

It was even worse than when Plasma tried to set sail.

I'm rhyming and rapping with endless precision.

While your entire saga is Team Magma's decision!

**Groudon: **Do I have to say this? You were owned by Team Aqua?

They fail so bad, I'd call it a hack, yeah?

I know, I know, I'm just copying your lines.

But everyone knows that I'm owning this time!

Your giant storm made you the world's biggest fool.

It failed worse than Rocket trying to catch Pikachu!

Ha! You're too cocky! You think you can annihilate!

Well, GO SOLARBEAM! IT'S KYOGRE YOU'LL DISENTEGRATE!

{Groudon fires a massive SolarBeam using the immense power of the sun. It looks as if it's all over for Kyogre. Wait! Rayquaza swooped in and blocked the SolarBeam!}

**Rayquaza: **Both of you! Stop fighting! You're equally equal!

Let's not argue over the lesser of two evils!

Groudon! You're a dino with the power of the earth!

But I think Arceus should have killed you at birth!

Kyogre! You're a whale with the power of the ocean!

But I think Arceus should have stopped this commotion!

You both cause trouble across the whole entire land!

While all these innocent Trainers are just chilling in the sand!

I think you both should be removed from the game!

Because you both have no signature moves! And your designs are lame!

{Rayquaza fires a Hyper Beam at Groudon, destroying him. Rayquaza then does the same thing to Kyogre, and flies off.}

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by Bladelord2000. Thanks Bladelord! If you have read this rap battle, please help it keep going by suggesting a battle!


	9. Emboar VS Delphox

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

EMBOAR!

VERSUS!

DELPHOOOOOX!

BEGIN!

**Delphox:** I don't need Magician to beat you, that's bullcrap.

My Mystical Fire will melt you, you fool sap.

I'm Psychic, I broke the curse of Fire/Fighting starters.

You're Fighting, however, I'm Psychic, hot as tartar.

My magic wand has taken legendaries down.

Your fat ugly body has made many trainers frown.

Don't need my raps to be you, just look at our elements!

Psychic versus Fighting, raps aren't even relevant!

**Emboar: **You think you're so smart with your telekinetic powers?

Well, then, I'll bash you for hours upon hours!

The winner of this battle? Well, who would've guessed it?

Your raps don't harm me! I'm unaffected!

I'm spittin' out lines off the top of my head.

But even though they aren't the best they've made your orange fire red.

I'll use Heat Crash on your body from dawn until dusk.

After that I'll grind your fat head with my razor-sharp tusks.

**Delphox: **Why should I throw flows at a mere barn creature?

That's just not fair! I'd totally beat you!

Since you're not worthy of my raps and I don't even care...

I'll send out Chesnaught to do my bidding, y'hear?

{Chesnaught does a frontflip onto the screen. Grabbing a microphone, Chesnaught starts to rap.}

**Chesnaught: **You had enough? Well it's time to face the Juggernaut Pokemon.

You're so ugly and fat, I'd call you a Jokemon.

It's impossible, for one fat pig with anger issues,

To beat two Gen sixers, and I know you wish you,

Could beat us, but you can't you know?

Because we're competitive battlers, you don't even got flow.

So swag up, and Bulk Up, and maybe you can try again.

But for now, just brush up on rapping, man, don't whine again.

**Emboar: **Delphox? What the heck? Is this some kind of joke?

Ches bro, you sound like you're half-asleep, have a can of Coke.

It'll take a lot more than this to trump the flaming swine.

So make up some raps that can actually match mine.

**Delphox: **Didn't like Chessy? It's okay I've got more friends.

Come on Greninja! Let's make this battle end!

{Greninja rushes on to the stage, ready to rap.}

**Greninja: **With my Speed, I've got infinite priority.

That includes my raps, too, not just moves, your raps bore me!

They're slow, just like you, and lame, just like you.

My raps are just like yours, times eighty-two.

I go much faster than you in both sorts of battle.

Makes you wish you had the ability Rattled.

Well now that I've concluded my light-speed lines,

I'll go, but Delphox pwned you this time.

**Emboar: **Two in a row? That's way too cheap.

Though I've got a little move for you all to keep.

I've got a Superpower for this guy,

{Uses Superpower on Greninja, making Greninja faint.}

And a Flamethrower for armor dude,

{Uses Flamethrower on Chesnaught, making Chesnaught faint.}

You probably thought you won, but this time you LOSE.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by SilverBird22. Thanks SilverBird! Please keep the suggestions coming!

**PREVIEW: **For the tenth Epic Pokemon Rap Battle, we are going to pit Zekrom against Reshiram... This will be the ULTIMATE battle...


	10. Reshiram VS Zekrom

Today we are going to have a special battle. It's going to be Zekrom against his counterpart, Reshiram. This battle features various Unova Pokemon. Get ready...

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

RESHIRAM!

VERSUS!

ZEKROOOOM!

BEGIN!

{Zekrom is lying on the ground of a castle. He appears to be dead. N rushes in with a generator. N plugs the generator into Zekrom's tail and runs it. Zekrom has come back to life and is ready to rap!}

**Zekrom: **You want to come at me, Reshiram? Well, get up and rhyme.

I'll beat you like I did in Pokemon Black &amp; White.

I seek ideals, you seek truth. Your dream is a fantasy.

I don't need to rap this whole time, cause I've got emissaries.

Emolga, Servine, Klinglang, and Scolipede.

Using Volt Switch, Steamroller, Gear Grind, and Leech Seed.

There's no way you can win because it's five against one.

Now come back to life so I can start the real fun.

{Reshiram is lying on the ground, as Zekrom was. He also appears to be dead. The castle's ceiling starts to crumble. Reshiram awakens in the nick of time and dodges the falling debris. Reshiram stands up, ready to attack.}

**Reshiram:** With your generator, you have infinite energy.

Your raps are too boring, man, I can't stand your lethargy.

I'll rip your PikaTail off, throw it in your trough,

After that I'll hand you the loss.

I'll ruin you faster than your trading card did.

You just can't battle on my level, kid.

This is the battle where you finally get screwed.

Now excuse me, I understand you're in a mood.

{Emolga flies onto the stage, ready to destroy Reshiram with raps.}

**Emolga: **You're missing the point, bro, I'll shock it into you.

Launching electricity at the speed of a .22

You're weak to Rock, Ground, Dragon, and Ice.

Well, scratch the last one, the others will suffice.

I'm a bro to Zekrom, we got the same type.

Everyone knows that Electric's gonna win this fight.

So hook up to a generator, get into the element.

Unlike you, we crush Pelipper the pelican.

{Reshiram lets loose with a tremendous roar, before sending out his ally Galvantula!}

**Galvantula: **Electric's gonna win this battle? Then face Galvantula.

Shoot Spider Webs with accuracy, larger than a tarantula.

I'll beat flying squirrels who unleash bolts with no power.

You also need grow up, make your raps louder.

Reshiram's a homie, not just because he's legendary.

But he's gotta do some rapping, and I am his emissary!

{Zekrom shoots Thunderbolts at Galvantula, and misses every time.}

**Zekrom: **A two-to-five ratio is still pretty good.

I'll smack your face just like Ghetsis did to Rood.

So prepare your body for the wrath of Bolt Strike.

Or else you'll have to face my friend: Servine!

{Servine leaps on-stage.}

**Servine: **You clearly don't get what we're trying to say.

So for your arrogance, you're gonna have to pay.

A white dragon and a yellow spider, what a sight.

But your raps are so bad I'd call them a fright.

I'll Vine Whip you both back to Chargestone Cave.

Where all the little Tynamo call Zekrom's name.

Then the hero comes in and shocks you to pieces.

And all of the crap from these two Pokemon ceases.

{Reshiram destroys Servine with a Fusion Flare.}

**Reshiram: **Zekrom, with all your buddies, it seems like you're too chicken,

To rap, so prepare for another round of butt kicking.

You've got two more friends left, Galv and I can crush them.

So when they come on out, I'll simply Dragon Rush them.

{Klinklang floats onto the stage.}

**Klinklang: **After this rap, I'll prove who rules Unova.

It's definitely Zekrom, bro, so move over.

You're a crappy rapping dragon with super-long hair.

So spit out your flames, because I don't care.

**Galvantula: **Reshiram's the boss, you don't seem to get it.

He could kick your butt in battle in under a minute.

So stop arguing, and just admit it.

Unova's been ruined, and your idol did it.

{Scolipede rushes out and starts to rap.}

**Scolipede: **No, Unova is Reshiram's fault.

No one cares about your raps so just grind to a halt.

Everyone knows your attacks are as sweet as a malt.

But mine, they taste about as good as pure salt.

**Reshiram: **There's four of you left, and just 2 of us.

But we're the strongest, you could faint from a Gust.

I think you've had enough of my raps, too weak to take it.

So just stick your head in the oven and bake it.

{Zekrom rips Galvantula apart with a Dragon Claw. This sparks a huge fight. Reshiram incinerates all of Zekrom's friends, killing them. Reshiram and Zekrom are destroying each other, when, suddenly...}

**Kyurem: **Stop fighting both of you!

{With that one simple line, Zekrom and Reshiram are calmed. Galvantula, Emolga, Servine, Klinklang, and Scolipede regenerate. Everything seems to be happy. But, Landorus rushes in and kills them all with an Earthquake followed by repetitive Stone Edges! Too bad. I thought this battle was gonna be good.}

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by Girl with the Fireheart. Thanks, and keep the suggestions coming!


	11. Dialga VS Palkia

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON! Season 2 Starter!

DIALGA!

VERSUS!

PALKIAA!

BEGIN!

**Dialga: **I control time, dork, you can't stop me.

You can't touch this, just try and pop me.

Made of metal, can't bruise me.

Resist your Dragon, lose to me.

I'll just smack you back when your manager sues me.

You control space, that's a useless addition,

To your already crappy arsenal, so it's my mission

To get rid of all crappy fighters, so stop your wishin'

That someday you might be as tough as Dialga, you kitten.

Don't wage war with a time god, you wuss.

Cause when you do I'll smack your brains into a bush.

Last man who fought me, wasn't a man at all.

It was Mega Mewtwo X, so much for his wall.

**Palkia: **I'll use Spacial Rend, who cares if you resist it?

I eat Arceus' Judgement for breakfast, but you just French kissed it!

Riddle me this genius, if my power is useless

How did I once endager Sinnoh? Well now you're quite clueless.

A legendary 17-foot-tall Steel Dragon Wall

Who can't take a Focus Blast, isn't good at all.

Sure, Dragon-type moves can really make an impact

But for the rest of your moves I'll dodge them and make it out intact.

**Dialga: **I can take a Focus Blast, that goes for Ground-types too.

I'd stop rapping against a force like this if I were you.

Because I'll rap this up before you even start your second verse.

My raps keep getting better, yours couldn't be any worse.

**Palkia: **Put up with my raps, you couldn't do any better.

A kindergartener can say the whole alphabet, you don't even know the first letter.

Here's a hint: There's two in your name, need a reminder for memory?

Two is the number of verses before I crush my enemy.

I've stayed with you long enough, it's time to get real.

I'll make you faint twice before you can heal.

Maybe some seven-year-old will catch you with a PokeBall.

Anyway, I win, deal with it, cause I'm off.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This was by far the most requested battle, so I did it! Enjoy!


	12. Samurott VS Serperior

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

SERPERIOR!

VERSUS!

SAMUROOOTT!

BEGIN!

**Serperior: **Serpent plus Superior, what does it equal?

It's my name, bro, now it's time to Dive deeper.

There's a million raps out there that are just waiting to be let loose.

You can't rap too well, but my rhymes are better than Dr. Seuss.

You do realize my type wins? Puts the Superior in Serperior.

Although you've got the type advantage, you could be shown up by Rhyperior.

So feel my Leer, will you, I've got a pretty nasty glare.

Let's hope in seventh gen there's an attack called Paralyzing Stare.

I guarantee I'd be the first creature to get it.

So why don't you give up trying to get a life and flame all day on Reddit?

**Samurott: **You're a disgrace to Pokemon. You were literally based off Satan.

You're what makes Pokemon offensive to Christians, despite the E rating.

So I'll take my shell sword off my leg and put it through your throat.

Stand up and rap while bruised, you crippled goat.

No one stands chance against me, not you, not Emboar either.

I could beat you regardless, even with the fever.

**Serperior: **Short and sweet lines, I see

I guess that's just your style.

Now why don't you just go to the bar

And drink beer for an hour.

It'd probably improve your rapping, I mean it couldn't make it worse.

Now excuse me while I copy you and make a six-line verse.

**Samurott: **It's obvious no one would choose a snake over a warrior!

**Serperior: **Well they would if the snake was stronger.

**Samurott: **You want long rhymes? Well I got some for ya!

**Serperior: **I want better, who cares about longer?

**Samurott: **Okay I got some they ain't gonna bore ya!

**Serperior: **They'd better not 'cause I'm done with you, bro.

I've battled much tougher wouldn't call you a foe.

If you want to battle a champ like me again.

I'd get better raps that don't get thrown in the bin.

**Samurott: **Fine, you want better? I won't give them!

Why should I listen to you? I won't listen!

I'll scare you stiff with my awesomesauce glare.

Don't try to mess with the blue shell bear.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by The Star of Neo-Nova! Thank you very much, and as always, please keep suggesting new raps! My apologies if this one was a bit short.

Make sure to vote for the new Pokemon Rap Battles. Poll is on my profile.

I'm always up for a battle in Pokemon X &amp; Y. If you want to battle, message me your Friend Code!


	13. Hydreigon VS Tyranitar

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

TYRANITAR!

VERSUS!

HYDREIGON!

BEGIN!

**Hydreigon:** Come on bro see who's the better Pseudo.

I could beat you in battle, normal or judo.

We're both Dark, weak to Fighting, but mind your own business.

I'm respected everywhere, your star's clouded by dimness.

Your whole life is a crime

And I don't give a dime

If you've even got half a heck of decent rhymes.

I've got three heads, I don't need 'em at all.

So I use two as arms, when I hear my passion call.

To fight, to battle, now that is my dream.

So come spar with the Master Hydreigon supreme.

**Tyranitar: **Ever heard the saying, "quality over quantity"?

The fact that your side heads don't have brains is an oddity.

I've got a secret weapon, I don't need it now.

But your ugly looking hair has raised many a brow.

I'll hit you with Blizzard, then a harsh Ice Beam.

It may be cold, but it ain't as sweet as ice cream.

You wouldn't have thought I could use Focus Blast?

Well I can, next time don't be such a smartass.

I've got many a move, even Aerial Ace.

Unleashing mad attacks all over the place.

**Hydreigon: **Who cares if you've got Ice Beam? Cause I don't give a crap!

You couldn't kill me even with a super-effective attack!

The "tar" in your name, is from Latin "tardus" meaning slow.

When I attack your ugly face will be bombarded, y'know?

I'll fly high above your cave, while dropping Dragon Tails.

You'll be totally unable to rap so you'll bail.

You can't go against me, I'll rip through your skull.

Now shut up and die 'cause you're too full of bull.

{Tyranitar lets a mighty roar escape his lungs. Hydreigon, obviously intimidated, hides behind a tree as Tyranitar Mega Evolves.}

**Mega Tyranitar: **You want to say anything about me now, you coward?

Well you're about to be attacked, 'cause now I'm overpowered.

With my mighyt Hyper Beam I'll destroy you and your item.

Stick your three heads at me well then I'll just bite 'em.

You're the ugliest thing in our franchise since Shuckle.

If you lost to that worm in a rock, I'd chuckle.

But we know it would happen, right, we do?

Even with your type advantage you can't even beat Natu.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by My Wunderwaffle iz missin. Thanks, Wunderwaffle, and as always, please keep the suggestions coming!

Make sure to vote on the next battle! Poll is on my profile page.


	14. Mega Charizard X VS Mega Charizard Y

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

CHARIZARD!

VERSUS!

CHARIZARD!

BEGIN!

{The two Charizard look at each other, not knowing what to do. They suddenly realize that they are each holding a Mega Stone. They both decide to Mega Evolve. After this, they realize that they are in a rap battle.}

EPIC RAP BATTLE OF POKEMON! {TAKE 2}

MEGA CHARIZARD X!

VERSUS!

MEGA CHARIZARD Y!

BEGIN!

**Charizard X: **I'll Dragon Rush you to pieces, with my Mega Tough Claws.

Hate to tell you this, but you can't put our game on pause.

We may be family, but I'll destroy my own kin.

When making Mega Evolutions, Game Freak shoulda dumped you in the bin.

Really, no one uses you, they'll always pick X over Y

Cause my attacks are flaming hot, yours are as harmless as pie

Whenever you come out in battle the opponent just sighs!

So I've got my attack ready. Now you get ready to die.

{Charizard X swoops at Charizard Y and uses Dragon Claw, tearing through Charizard Y's wing. Charizard Y, injured, raps although he is in great pain."

**Charizard Y: **So you think you can rap? Well all you do is attack.

And you're probably taking buckets of steroids behind my back.

You're so weak you could get killed by Delibird's Present sack.

You're not even strong if your Trainer uses hacks.

While you've got tons of Attack, my Special Attack's higher.

Even with your Dragon type, you can't dowse my fire.

Face the fact that you're weak, you're turning into a liar.

You're battling Charizard Y, the great mystifier.

**Charizard X: **Rhyming words isn't strength, that's the quote of the day.

While I strike down whole teams, a Sunkern can keep you at bay.

I've got a friend, Mewtwo, well you don't say.

Mewtwo! Go! Mega Evolve! Make him pay!

{Mewtwo Mega evolves into Mega Mewtwo X.}

**Mewtwo X: **Think you can beat my Psychic/Fighting?

Well you're a Flying-type, watch me strike with lightning.

I've got Thunderbolt, this'll be exciting.

You say you're part Fire, well then you'll find this "igniting".

{Mewtwo X uses Thunderbolt on Charizard Y. Charizard Y, almost dead, keeps rapping.}

**Charizard Y: **How cheap! You kill your opponent, when

This is a _rap battle_, and I'm almost dead!

Not from your raps but you used a cheap move.

Well, I've got my own friend, you're gonna lose.

{A Gengar comes to help Charizard Y. Gengar Mega evolves into Mega Gengar.}

**Mega Gengar: **You may have beaten Y, now it's time to beat a Ghost.

I was banned competitively, I'm the one to boast.

I'm Poison, you're Psychic, why does that matter?

I'll die, or I'll beat you, it's gonna be the latter.

While you're being used by ten-year-olds on Battle Spot,

Charizard X is left in PC's until his head rots off.

I'm used in Ubers, overpowered, just try to stop my force.

Because I'm an awesome beastly ghost, you're a fat dragon and a horse.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was picked because it won the poll! Hope you guys liked it!

Sorry for being a bit lazy with the rap battles! I've been working with my other story, please check it out!

THE #15 RAP BATTLE IS: Magikarp VS. Rattata. Stay tuned!


	15. Magikarp VS Rattata

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

MAGIKARP!

VERSUS!

RATTATA!

BEGIN!

**Magikarp: **A battle to see who's weaker, wow that's creative.

Do I want to fight this or not? I've been contemplative.

But I can surely win, against a little buck-toothed rat.

Giving raps as cold as ice, so hold onto your hat.

**Rattata: **I'll interrupt here don't want you to go further.

You rap like you got bound, gagged, and then murdered.

I mean seriously, the world would be a better place to live

If you would just go die in a hole and meet Death's scythe.

**Magikarp: **Don't try to interrupt me, I'm not finish dissing

This fat blue rat with diseases, you'd be better fishing.

Your F. E. A. R. strategy is like using Bastiodon as a sweeper.

Now it's time for me to Bounce high, and then we'll dive deeper.

**Rattata: **I could go on for hours, about your useless powers

I mean, Splash, Tackle, Flail, Bounce? I don't care if you can leap a tower.

Your PokeDex entry says you can jump pretty high.

I hope there's a set of Spikes beneath you, so you' die.

**Magikarp: **Stop butting in after all my fourth lines.

You call that rapping? I call it a smart mouth who whines.

I'll evolve into Gyarados, see what you think then.

You can't even learn Bite until Level 10!

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

Sorry this battle was short! Anyway, it was suggested by hoops. Thank you hoops, and please keep suggesting battles!


	16. Blastoise VS Lugia

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

BLASTOISE!

VERSUS!

LUGIAAAA!

BEGIN!

**Lugia: **You want to deal with the winds, the psychics, the storm?

I can even beat you with no Mega Form.

You're a fat blue turtle with two cannons on your back.

That really makes no sense, what did ya, eat a thousand Big Macs?

I can take all your liquids, even your solid Ice Beam.

Your Skull Bash ain't no problem, I'll dodge it without Double Team.

My goal is to make this battle stand out from all the others.

Because the series is ending soon, joining all its discontinued brothers.

So I'll destroy you, and make it up to all the fans.

I'm a Legendary, fool, if I wanna do something I can.

So get out of my face, and start attacking, not defending.

Cause I really am this tough, unlike you, I'm not pretending.

**Blastoise: **You think you're somethin', huh? Well I'm Blasty's mascot.

Sure, he just writes bad fanfics, but at least I got something.

I can't rhyme, I'm sorry, I'll make it up with brute force.

After this battle get ready to feel some remorse.

I get to battle a pink dino, well that's not an honor.

You've made a bad move, now get ready for slaughter.

Cause you're a goner

You're my fodder

You're just a mental freak bother.

My raps actually make sense, while your whole life is a yawner.

**Lugia: **Don't even try to disrespect the icon of Silver.

And if you take one step closer it's your face I'll pilfer.

With my wings, with the span of the whole land of Japan.

I'll make your attacks into popsicles, and be the ice cream man.

You should live in the Arctic, with your Ice and Water.

You make all these empty threats, you're the one to be slaughtered.

The whole earth trembles at the mention of my name.

So let's get started, a real battle, not a simple game.

**Blastoise: **I don't go against Mons twice my size and half my IQ.

With your nonexistent offenses, you think I'd be low enough to fight you?

I'm just gonna Dive back into my ocean.

Because I'm too strong for you, now quit boasting.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by SilverBird22. Thanks, SilverBird22! Keep suggesting awesome battles!

Now, for an announcement. This is rap battle 16 of 20. This means that there are _**four more rap battles,**_ so this is your last chance for a suggestion. I'll miss these when I'm done, but I've decided to move on to actual stories. Thank you for your continued support, and keep suggestions coming for the last four battles!


	17. Zangoose VS Heatmor

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

ZANGOOSE!

VERSUS!

HEATMOOOR!

BEGIN!

**Zangoose: **Come to the ferret feel my slash

I beat Misty, Brock, and Ash.

Double claws means double tough.

So be prepared when I start to get rough.

I'm battling a flaming aardvark? What am I doing with my life?

My claws sting like a bullet and pierce like a knife.

I'm gonna win before your raps begin

Your attacks are so crappy I'd even call them a sin.

Your stats are a disgrace are you ever even used?

You could even be beaten by a simple Pichu!

**Heatmor: **Here we have a show-off who relies on physical bulk.

You may have sharp claws but you'll never match the Hulk.

I'm an aardvark you're a feline

Yo get out and make a beeline

Or you'll feel the inferno

Of my fire, hot as a volcano.

Let's make this a rap worthy of the final four.

So we'll bring in Jay-Z and throw you out the door.

**Zangoose: **I can easily slash through a 4-foot elephant

Your face looks pretty vulgar, get a plastic surgeon.

I'll Hone my Claws, use X-Scissor to rip through your ugly trumpet.

Smash your red body into hot tea and crumpets.

I mean what's with your tail? It looks Mario's pipe.

And what's with your attacks? You couldn't handle Lucario, right?

**Heatmor: **How dare you diss the blaze, you can't handle Seviper.

You're a drunk ferret-cat, hopped up on candy, yeah, you're hyper.

With those crazy eyes, you look just like a Patrat.

You belong in anime, but get out of my game, drat.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE! This battle was suggested by My Wunderwaffle iz missin. Thank you, and keep the suggestions coming!

Also, I have to thank you guys for over _2000 views!_ This is incredible, higher than the average YouTube video. Thank you very much!


	18. Moltres VS Articuno

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

MOLTRES!

VERSUS!

ARTICUNOOOOO!

BEGIN!

**Moltres: **Ooo, today we got the Ice versus Fire,

You can replicate Zapdos with a telephone wire.

Let's not talk about this and get back to business.

I can overcome Stealth Rock, I'm gonna win this.

No one ever used you, not in Red or X and Y.

Who cares about a bird that can hardly even fly?

I mean your sprite stands on the ground, bro that's really lame.

In every single game your stupid role is the same!

Watch me Flame Charge right through your intestines.

It's a One-hit KO so no Chesto Restin'.

With the wings of the inferno and the beak of fury,

I'll strike you with moves until your vision goes blurry.

**Articuno: **Don't get all high and mighty cause you have the type advantage.

With my one-hit death Sheer Cold I'll be causing all the damage.

'Cause I'm shameless

And I'm blameless

You're just heinous

You're the lamest

So grow up and stop rapping thinking that you'll become famous.

You belong on Naruto, Ninjago, or Beyblade, not Pokemon.

Your fake design, it's hideous, bro, I could go on and on.

I really don't want to stand here and rap knowing that I'll be voted for.

I need a challenge, so I'm leaving, I'll just, um, Fly right out the door.

**Moltres: **I see you're a coward, you even look like a chicken.

When I see your ugly feathers my whole body starts to sicken.

**Articuno: **Wow, you're creative, you're the Rapper of the Year,

NOT. When you see my ice, you'll start to scream in fear.

GOT IT? So just sit on your couch and why not have a beer?

HAVE A LOT. It can't possibly mess you up anymore, can it? Y'hear?

**Moltres: **This battle's going downhill and it's because of your lyrics

You're weaker than a Spritzee, could be beaten by a Swirlix

You're uglier than Granbull and you're fatter than a Snorlax

Plus your stats are as good as Sunkern and you're just as slow as Steelix.

**Articuno: **Well you can't even rap.

**Moltres: **Uh huh.

**Articuno: **Nuh uh.

**Moltres: **Uh huh.

(Zapdos flies on stage.)

**Zapdos: **Stop arguing, we all know which of us can take Stealth Rock, right?

And we all know which of us can actually use flight!

I'll shoot my lightning bolts, they're super-effective on you both!

After this, both your types will be, Flying and Ghost.

(Zapdos zaps both of them and flies away.)

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by SilverBird22! Thanks, SilverBird, and keep the suggestions coming!

I'm going to need a killer of a battle for the finale. If you think you've got an idea for the finale, please PM me.


	19. Trevenant VS Gourgeist

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

TREVENANT!

VERSUS

GOURGEIST!

BEGIN!

**Trevenant: **Welcome to the forest, where I sing my death chorus

Your design is lame, bro, you're just another 'Mon to bore us.

I've got competitive use, you're stuck in RU, maybe worse.

I'm a useful Pokemon to quench competitor's thirst.

**Gourgeist:** You're a tree, I'm a pumpkin, that's obvious, whatever.

You won't win this battle, but you can try to Endeavor.

You can't use that move, so you got no chance

I'll use my Perish Song to put you in a trance.

**Trevenant:** You got no talent for this, just go back to the woods.

I'm a living ghost tree, you're a pumpkin with a hair hood.

And your arms, they make me sick, they look entirely articifial.

You're not a good defender with HP as low as your Special.

Your base stats are higher than mine, but they're terribly placed.

With Special Defense that low I'll leave you flat on your face.

We're both Ghost/Grass, but we are far from the same.

I've already mocked your stats, crushed you, so we're done with this game.

**Gourgeist: **Ah, I sing my song, look at my entry, it means you're cursed.

I wrap prey in my hairlike arms, but the pain only gets worse.

I sing joyfully as I watch you suffer, so-called king of the forest.

You can trap me in the woods forever? Well, then, go move some trees for us.

**Trevenant: **I'll show this hairy gourd who is the king of nature.

Screw that, I'm the Ghost master too, you wormy hater.

You'll see just how harsh these grassy battles can prove to be.

Because your fate is unavoidable, you'll lose to me.

**Gourgeist: **Do what I said, move a big fat tree.

I don't care if it's Oak, Elm, Birch, Rowan, Sycamore, or even Ivy.

You claim to have power, but can't even show it!

It's because you're a clumsy, weak, idiotic fool, and you know it!

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by The Ultimate Lampent. Thanks, Lampent!

Suggestions are no longer being taken for these battles as the next one is to be the last. However, since these battles seem to be successful, I have created a new account for making more rap battles as well as music parodies. The name is BlastyMusic. So, once these battles end, new ones will be posted there.


	20. Arceus VS Giratina: Season 1 Finale

{Arceus flies down from the sky, sheer power swirling around him. He releases a tremendous roar that shakes the very ground.}

{Giratina pops out of the earth, exhibiting extreme defiance. It looks like there's going to be a Legendary fight... Giratina uses Aura Sphere!}

{Arceus dodges and uses Judgement. Giratina takes it with no damage done. It looks like this can only be settled with a rap battle!}

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

ARCEUS, THE GOD OF ALL POKEMON!

VERSUS!

GIRATINA, THE POKEMON MADE OF PURE EVIL!

BEGIN!

**Arceus: **You'd better back down, cause we know who's gonna win.

I created our whole world, you're a tardigrade made of sin.

You've got two big claws, but what else you gonna do?

You're a Ghost-type, but not capable of beating Mewtwo.

With my 1000 arms, I shaped your universe.

I'll censor your nonsensical words, like the admins of Miiverse.

I've got endless ammunition, I can be any single type I want.

Man, your design's less creative than Duck Hunt.

**Giratina: **You shaped the world with your bazillion arms? Who gives a crap?

You're basically the boss of Diamond and Pearl, but you fight like Klap Trap!

Relying on intimidation? I'm not fooled by your tricks!

Even a puny Tailwind blows you out like a candle's wick!

I've got some of my Pokemon, created from my darkness.

Here comes the Pokemon of murder! Cofagrigus!

{Giratina forms a portal made of pure evil. Cofagrigus floats out and begins to attack.}

**Cofagrigus: **I'm the Pokemon of murder, I'll take your darn life.

I turn humans into mummies, Unova's where I cause strife.

I just want your gold, I proved that in Mystery Dungeon.

So fork it over, unless you want to be wrapped like a breaded onion.

**Arceus: **You're a sadist, heinous, sociapath.

Well you rebelled against me and chose the wrong path.

Turn to the light, and develop some feelings.

Now I've got my own minion, with the good deed of healing.

**Blissey: **Hey, it's Blissey here, but I won't crack my eggs for you!

You're a flying demon snake, heart colder than Mewtwo!

I'm chubby, lovable, and all around righteous!

Check out my HP and Special Defense! You can't fight this!

I know you want my cake, my bread, and my powers!

Just come to the good side, for the victory's ours!

You can't use Toxic on me, sir, I've got Softboiled!

But all you ever got from rebellion was spoiled!

**Giratina: **Bah! What kind of fighter is a Kirby-esque glutton?

You send that to fight me? You're pushin' my buttons.

I'll send out Jynx, Darkrai, Exploud, Primeape, and Scrafty.

Representin' Lust, Darkness, Clamor, Anger, and Craftiness respectively!

**Jynx: **Lust after me, because you just love my figure.

**Darkrai: **I've got a whole entire army of goths, go figure.

**Exploud: **ALL YOUR RELIGION DOES IS RESTRICT YOU FROM FUN, YO!

**Primeape: **Why not get drunk instead of sitting there eating matzo?

**Scrafty: **You can't lie, steal, lust, be goth, or murder?

**Darkrai: **What fun is your life if you just jump over hurdles?

**Jynx: **So come, sin already, turn away from Arceus.

**Exploud: **SO DID WE CHANGE YOUR MIND? YOU'RE GONNA BE DARK, YES?

**Arceus: **Ha! That's preposterous!

Your words won't make a scratch!

Your attack is sinning?

You can't even win a match!

Learn to give to charity!

With all that money you steal

How come now you're at a scarcity?

So quit your lying, theft, lust, darkness, bisexuality

And realize that when you fight Delibird

You lose in generosity

**Delibird: **I give to the poor, the needy, the homeless

But you guys are fools, and also quite boneless

You steal tons of crap but you can't give a quarter

When you see a hobo on the sidewalk who wants his life back in order.

I give presents every day! In fact that's my main move!

So admit it already! I gave you a bomb! You lose!

{Liepard springs onto the stage.}

**Liepard: **I give to the poor every day *hee hee* NOT!

I cover up everything with lies, let's see what you've got!

Darkness is fun! Just switch and you'll see!

The win of this religious battle goes to me.

**Arceus: **You're going down! Judgment Day is coming!

When I use my base 100 STAB move you'll go running!

I'll bring the good ones to heaven to live for eternity!

But you're going down to burn as my enemy!

**Pansage: **Cover your mouth! Speak no evil!

**Panpour:** Shut your eyes and see no evil!

**Pansear: **Plug your ears and hear no evil!

**Giratina: **But you don't want to mess with Weavile!

**Weavile: **I'll steal all your shillings, I'm the master of theft!

I put Jessie and James to shame! I'm the very best!

Fork over your money, all your Rare Candies, also!

I heard the sweet voice of gluttony call, so...

**Giratina: **So... what?

**Arceus: **DEATH!

{Arceus Hyper Beamed all of them to death. The end!}

WHO WON?

This battle was suggested by Contestshipping Pro. Thank you so much!

Thank you guys for making this rap battle successful! It has received much more positive reception than I had ever hoped to get. At current time, it has received:

58 Reviews  
10 Followers  
11 Favorites  
2893 Views

Two months ago when I started this series, I expected it to just be another story that got maybe 1 review and 100 or so views. Thank you guys again for all the success!

This is the last Epic Pokemon Rap Battle. :'(

However, I have made a new account called BlastyMusic where I will be continuing the rap battles under the name of Ultimate Pokemon Rap Battles.

Account: BlastyMusic

Thank you guys again!


	21. Meowth VS Liepard

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

MEOWTH!

VERSUS!

LIEPARD!

BEGIN!

**Meowth: **Hoarding money is my job

I'm the pinnacle of Rocket

I'll Pay Day your *ss

And steal right outta your pocket.

Sucks for you, thief, 'cause this just got real.

Fury Swipe you to shreds before you can heal.

Rip out dem nerves so you can't even feel.

Whatcha runnin' for? Scared? What's your deal?

**Liepard: **You may think you're clever, but your brain is screwed.

You run around with two emos trying to steal Pikachu.

I've got some use in UU and stuff like that

You suck with Eviolite and so does your dad.

Fake Out, Night Slash, the ultimate double.

With just two moves I'll reduce your HQ to rubble.

And with that kind of tiny IQ you're in trouble.

You may have taught yourself to talk, but your whine can burst bubbles.

Let me Unburden you of that cash

Pff, you couldn't Unnerve a Zubat.

Pickup that verse, stop Screeching as you talk.

Also, you should crawl, Meowths weren't made to walk.

You learned to speak as a Last Resort

You were desperate for love, but you're too ugly to court.

Obviously you were turned down. Reason: You're a freak.

I'll Play Rough with you, right after Double Team.

**Meowth: **Ha! I'll shove you into a ball! (make it rain!)

Send you to the boss and get put into the Hall! (of fame)

Instead of raining with money I'll be snowing with diamonds!

You'll be stuck in Wonder Trade for ever, with energy siphoned.

I'm in Smash Bros, kick Ash, bro

Get on my level

When Team Rocket takes over

The whole world will tremble.

**Liepard: **Don't try to predict things you don't understand

That's like me trying to tell the future of Swords Dance.

This battle ends now with your head smashed on the pavement.

Go tell your team they're as barbarian as cavemen.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

For all of you who read my previous rap battle and thought it was the last, SIKE! Not really! (By the way, BlastyMusic was a joke account.) Hope you enjoy the weekly releases of Season 2 Pokemon Rap Battles. Peace!


	22. Rapidash VS Zebstrika

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

RAPIDASH!

VERSUS!

ZEBSTRIKA!

BEGIN!

**Zebstrika: **I've got higher Speed, that should put you to shame

'Cause you've got both "Rapid" and "Dash" in your name.

Oh my gosh, it's Rapidash, what'll we do?

She'll rub her fiery little *ss and put a burn on you!

That name isn't scary, it sounds like all you do is Run Away.

Well you're not going anywhere doing our battle today.

Flash that Fire all you want, I'll take a burn any day.

I'd advise you to look out, Volt Switch's comin' your way.

**Rapidash: **An Electric-type Strika that can't even use Bolt Strike?

Your electricity is even lower than Electrike's.

Sip all the Sap you want, I'll just burn it all up.

Stomp your nuts so hard, you'll wish you'd brought a cup.

**Zebstrika: **So you wanna talk dirty, go ahead.

Be who you really are, a flaming mental-head.

What's the point in you having Fury Attack?

Launchin' little bitty horns, like ratta-tat-tat.

15 damage each hit, and 85 accuracy.

An attack like that debunks the Pokemon War conspiracy.

Step up the pace, act like you're fast.

With a Flare Blitz such as yours, even Paras could last.

**Rapidash: **Grass/Bug zombies are the least of my worries

I spit burning blazing raps, way hotter than curry

You're as slow as Shelmet, and as ugly as Muk.

Go tell all your Electric-type friends that they suck!

Gallop away, before the pain starts.

Better buy every Potion from every Mart.

Lightning Rod this, you black and white freak.

You'll be in the Pokemon Center for at least a week.

(Rapidash uses Megahorn on Zebstrika.)

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by Girl with the Fireheart. Thank you!

If you enjoyed this battle, please leave a review!

NEXT BATTLE: Sceptile VS. Lucario 2


	23. Lucario VS Sceptile 2

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

LUCARIO!

VERSUS!

SCEPTILE!

BEGIN!

**Lucario: **You're going down for the second time again.

Give up already, there's no way for you to win.

I'm based off of an Egyptian God, who cares about your scepter?

You can't fight me, you couldn't even take an Espurr!

Get ready for my Aura Sphere

It'll make you rattle with fear

I'll Unburden you of your pride tonight

And I'll stir up some fright

With a repetitive Calm Mind

Even my Close Combat can kill the worst of foes.

My Special's so dope that my scream shatters windows.

So you'd better watch out, you've been a naughty boy.

The Anubis 'Mon is the real McCoy.

(Lucario uses Aura Sphere on Sceptile. The attack merely bounces off! Sceptile whirls around.)

**Sceptile:** Who's gonna stop this brown metal entity?

Who posed as a Special Sweeper to steal my identity?

Weak to Ground and Fire and his very own type?

Very overrated and very overhyped?

Look! It's the Grass ninja of Gen 3!

Launching Leaf Storms and jumpin' from tree to tree!

Can fight in land, through storm, in sea?

It's Scep t-i-l single E.

Extend my leaf blades to your skinny little throat.

You'll whimper with fear, cause there'll be no hope.

It's death for you, stupid goth metal cat.

You should slap yourself for being such a doormat.

**Lucario: **Yes, I hear you, but I don't even care.

You're about as strong as my flipping teddy bear.

I'm quite fly, you're a fat green turd.

Let me introduce you to my friend Delibird.

**Delibird: **I'm fighting for a god for the second time around.

Time to Pound this big fat hound into the ground.

Ice Beam that fat donkey Grass until it dies.

Then I'll drop kick that bush of a tail into the skies.

**Sceptile: **Oh, so this Santa-esque parrot thinks he's got it?

I'll bury him alive until his organs have rotted.

I don't need to keep going 'cause you've already been bashed.

Now here's my rapping friend with the mustache.

**Alakazam: **Look at this atrocity,

ExtremeSpeeding at high velocity.

Little does OU know, this dip isn't quite a monstrosity.

He ain't some Egyptian catastrophe

But I'd say his rapping skills have atrophied.

This glass cannon sucks, he's not even a match for me.

(Lucario Mega Evolves into Mega Lucario!)

(Sceptile Mega Evolves into Mega Sceptile!)

(Aura Spheres are launched! Leaf Storms are summoned! The only way to settle this is with a third battle! Maybe next season.)

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by PokemonXYFan104. Thank you, and please keep suggesting battles!

I'm going to be away next week, so the next battle will be here two weeks from now. Peace.


	24. Rampardos VS Tyrantrum

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

RAMPARDOS!

VERSUS!

TYRANTRUM!

BEGIN!

**Rampardos: **Get ready to be sent back to the Jurassic times.

My stats may be low, but my Attack is sublime.

You can't resist my Rock Slide, you'll be crushed beneath the force.

4 times resistant to Fire, but an Ember could leave you scorched.

I'll Head Smash with you, get ready for a broken skull.

I'll take half the damage, but you'll take the whole.

Too bad your Strong Jaw won't help any move with STAB.

I bet the scientists removed the strength from your fossil while working on it at the lab.

Really? Your counterpart is Aurorus?

The one whose design was made purely to bore us?

Who looks like a Rock slash Ice blue horse?

You sure aren't scary for a rock Tyrannosaurus.

**Tyrantrum: **ROOOOAAR! SILENCE!

I'll rip that rock *ss of yours to shreds for your insolence.

My Strong Jaw rips all you turds in half, so watch out!

A critical Head Smash from you couldn't kill Meowth!

So be careful!

My target has been acquired!

You'll take harsher raps than Dis Raps for Hire!

You can't beat me, or even put up a decent fight!

The flame has been fueled! It's time to ignite.

**Rampardos:** I don't give a crap about what you say.

We all know I could win any day!

When I'm done with you, they'll put your bones in a museum!

I'll Focus and blast you, like my name was Alakazam.

**Tyrantrum: **ROOOOOARRR! YOU'RE GONNA BE SLAUGHTERED!

I wouldn't even wanna live if I was rockin' that body.

Fat all around, and a patch on your skull.

Eyes wide open like you chugged some Red Bull.

I don't even know what the heck's your problem!

Hunched over and ugly, like some screwed-up rock goblin!

If you want it to be over, just give me a call.

I'll be glad to kill you, because you leave me appalled.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by My Wunderwaffle iz missin. Thanks, Wunderwaffle!

There is a poll on my profile for upcoming battles. Make sure to vote!

**PREVIEW FOR NEXT WEEK: **Grovyle VS. Dusknoir

ATTENTION: Some bloopers have been caught in some of my previous chapters.  
Chapter 2: Aggron is not 4 times weak to Rock, but Rhyperior states that this is true. Rather, Aggron is 4 times weak to Ground.  
Chapter 5: Sceptile actually does have a Mega Evolution.

These battles are now on Wattpad, thanks to LucarioMaster41. story/18763627-epic-pokemon-rap-battles-season-1


	25. Dusknoir VS Grovyle

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

GROVYLE!

VERSUS!

DUSKNOIR!

BEGIN!

**Dusknoir: **So, you think you got what it takes?

Either put up a fight, or get your soul raked.

This green lizard ain't no match for a reaper.

When you die, I don't merely take your body deeper.

I drag it to a dimension of fear and pain!

A place that would drive anyone insane!

No happiness dwells in this place!

No color! No sound! No fun or games!

Better stay alive for as long as possible.

But staying alive forever is impossible.

Especially when you're my target.

Prepare yourself. You'll be bombarded.

Shadow Balls launched your direction.

Max Damage STAB, pinnacle of perfection.

I'll Split the Pain of death with you.

This is another day you'll rue.

**Grovyle: **Nice hat, dork, too bad it's part of your body.

Why's there a doorknob on your head? Your design was already shoddy.

Grope around, you phantom, you big fat fail.

You look like a blind person searching for the Braille.

Might as well give up, you won't harm me.

You're not strong at all, and you look like Barney.

Jack-O-Lantern on your stomach and Mickey Mouse gloves.

You're about as harmless as a Pidove.

Enough of me talking about how weak you are.

Your design's been criticized, it's the worst by far.

Your learnset? Ridiculous. Seriously?

Can't learn Will-O-Wisp until Level 30?

Lot of leveling up to do for such a weak attack.

Hardly hits at all, but Guts'll smack you back.

And Hex at Level 42? Don't make me laugh.

Last Resort might not be good, but Hex is only half of that!

**Dusknoir: **Insolent little twerp! Be careful!

Or I'll butcher you and sell you at market by the handful!

Then I'll pilot your soul to the depths of despair.

So make another move, if you dare.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!


	26. Miltank VS Tauros

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

TAUROS!

VERSUS!

MILTANK!

BEGIN!

**Miltank: **You're gonna lose this battle, yes you will.

I'll use Milk Drink then Body Slam for the kill.

You're always male, you can only reproduce with Ditto.

Pff. Weak barnyard chump. I'd compare you to Skiddo.

You don't Intimidate me. You're just ticked off.

Step to me and get your tail ripped. off.

I'll Stomp you to death, then have a bull burger.

I'm such a boss that I'm a cannibal/murderer.

**Tauros: **You can't win. You disgust me.

No way you could win, you appear to have gotten rusty.

You have Milk Drink? I don't give a dime.

That puts disgusting images in my mind.

You've got a ball on your tail, what the heck?

I'll use Wild Charge to break your neck.

I be ripping off your udders and eating 'em for breakfast.

You've got no niche in our game, but I totally wrecked it.

Stomp you in the face with the effect of a Rage.

This cow just got kicked off the PokeDex page.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

I apologize for the lack of a battle last week. My computer hasn't been saving my documents so I wasn't able to make one. That's why this battle was so short (I had a day to make it).

Anyway, now for an announcement. I'm not sure If I'll still be doing these battles, because I've gotten a YouTube channel and a couple battles are in production for that. But I'll need help with the YouTube battles. If you can help, please PM me on FanFiction.

I'll try to finish up Season 2 before I quit this story.


	27. Vaporeon VS Flareon

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

FLAREON!

VERSUS!

VAPOREON!

BEGIN!

**Vaporeon: **Hydro Pump this Eeveelution to put out the flame.

No one'll be missing nothing, you're the worst in the game.

Amazing Attack, you'd think I couldn't survive.

But a flipping Fire Fang is all you have to utilize.

I'm in OU, I doubt you could make it to NU.

An Ice Beam could kill you, so I'll use it to own you.

I've got awesome HP and a resistance to your STAB.

Even if you hold a Focus Sash, I've got Quick Attack.

I've got Water Gun, and Water Pulse

Hyper Beam and Shadow Ball

That's really all I need.

I could even take Tyranitar.

**Flareon: **You're just a weak Water fish. Join the Magikarp club.

You think I can't battle? Lemme tell you something, bud.

Obviously you haven't tried the Sixth Generation.

I finally got Flare Blitz and it was my salvation.

I'll use Fire Fang, Flare Blitz, and Tackle to break your HP fort.

Then while you're at minimum HP I'll just use Last Resort.

You can't even burn me so as to nerf my attack.

I'll tank all your Water moves and hit you back with a Quick Attack.

**[Jolteon flies down from the sky.]**

**Jolteon: **Shame you've gotta battle me, Trainers know I'm such a baller.

I'll Thunder Shock you to pieces and leave your gore smeared on my white collar.

I'm OP, don't even think about killin' me.

You can't even go first because I'm rockin' Agility.

Double Kick you in half, even though I've got bad Attack.

I've got an awesome Special stat, it's really helping in my rap.

Rain Dance and Thunder, right down your spine.

It's pretty obvious no one can match my rhymes.

**[Umbreon rushes into the battle.]**

**Umbreon:** Get ready to have your nuts blasted to bits with a Dark Pulse.

My name's Umbreon, I love dark stuff, and the occult.

I'm sporting Defenses that would make Bastiodon jealous.

I think we all know you guys are just too overzealous.

I'll just laugh while you shoot attacks at me, tryin' to fight.

Then I'll recover all my lost HP with a single Moonlight.

I'll Knock Off all your Items so you can't take a Will-O-Wisp.

Then I'll Knock Off all your heads using only my fist.

**[Espeon jumps in.]**

**Espeon: **I may be Psychic-type but I can still beat Umbreon.

Flareon and Jolteon stand no chance. Neither does Vaporeon.

Try Paralyzing, Burning or Poisoning me, I won't Detect it.

I've got Synchronize, so I won't be the only one affected.

Better make a Wish, that you won't be destroyed by Psyshock.

I'm so OP with Magic Bounce! I could beat a Mega Garchomp.

Now it's obvious I win because I had the best chorus.

Battling me is as dangerous as Inflora Forest!

**[Leafeon joins the battle.]**

**Leafeon: **We just skipped a gen but now we're back with Leafeon.

I'll rip through you with my Leaf Blade, nice try, Espeon.

I got the Attack, and Defense and the Speed to kill.

I'll make your death faster than a cyanide pill.

I've got SolarBeam, Leaf Guard, and Sunny Day.

Good thing I evolved to get rid of Run Away.

It's too late for you all. The sun is in effect.

My SolarBeam is charging and its power is immense.

**[Glaceon joins the battle.]**

**Glaceon: **Everyone retreat! You're about to be buffeted by Hail!

Most of you are in NU, 'cause you're all epic fails.

I'm cloaked by snow, and have a body of Ice.

When I hit you with a Blizzard it sure won't feel nice.

I can freeze the atmosphere to make a diamond-dust flurry

Then hit you all with Icy Wind until your vision goes blurry.

I've got the Defenses to take all the crap you guys can launch.

When it comes to rap battles, you guys are somehow worse than Smosh.

**[Sylveon jumps in.]**

**Sylveon: **Who better to wrap this battle up than a fairy?

You guys can't fight at all, I doubt you could beat Clefairy.

My Dazzling Gleam is the last thing you'll see before you die.

I kill seven Eeveelutions as easy as a Beautifly.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

The battles will now be coming out with no particular schedule, like I used to do when I first started them. Keep updated by following!


	28. Ninetales VS Zoroark

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

NINETALES!

VERSUS!

ZOROARK!

BEGIN!

**Zoroark:** I hide in the shade all day, you can't find me.

No one would want you even if you were Shiny.

I got Zorro in my name. I'm a clever fox.

You couldn't take me down even with Nasty Plot.

Got no H.A., I'm too beast for that.

The shadows of darkness are my habitat.

Look behind you. I'll evade your eyes.

Because I'm aided by a natural disguise.

I can't be Imprisoned. I'm much too fast.

Couldn't knock me out with a Focus Blast.

You'll be Tormented because I'm out of sight.

I'm preparin' my attack, so say goodnight.

**Ninetales:** You think you're so tough, but you're too wuss to battle.

Couldn't take a Bug-type even with a boost from Rattled.

All you do is hide away.

You're as hated as Friday.

I'm cool as ice, but I spit hot rhymes.

Attack all you want. I'll emerge fine.

You've put far too much on your plate.

About to get beaten by #38!

**Zoroark: **Wow, that was good, but I won't U-Turn it.

I guess if I wanna win, I'll have to earn it.

Sike! Your raps sucked. Made me wanna hurl.

I'm black. I'll win. You're just a white girl.

**Ninetales: **No need to get sexist on me.

I'll kill you with an Extrasensory.

Wait, you're Dark? I thought you were a Fairy.

Well, I'll beat you so bad, you'll need a Sitrus Berry.

You prove that 5th Gen ran out of ideas.

Your brain's as simple as furniture from Ikea.

After this battle, those Tears won't be Fake.

The only thing that could kill me is Earthquake.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!


	29. Ludicolo VS Abomasnow

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

LUDICOLO!

VERSUS!

ABOMASNOW!

BEGIN!

**Ludicolo: **I'll take this one at my Own Tempo

I'm a carefree lilypad, you look like a fat embryo.

Can't Ice me, fool, I'm half Grass, half Water.

Hope you're prepared for a funfest of slaughter.

Got a Mega Evolution, but still in RU.

Don't worry, I saved a Fire Punch for you.

I'm not scared of your Hail, I'll just use a Rain Dance.

Scare you so bad, you'll crap your abominable pants.

**Abomasnow:** I'm a 7 foot 300 pound flipping ice yeti.

Make like Reggie and get your body ready.

Take an Ice Shard for real, so tough you can't heal

You're a Grass-type but I bet you couldn't beat Seel.

Let's not make this get Physical.

The look on your face is quite quizzical.

You're just a stupid Mexican duck. And you suck.

I'll mow you down 'cause I'm the size of a truck.

**Ludicolo:** This colocynth don't like what he's hearin'.

Won't dance to that, I'll just keep a-Leerin'.

Raps are cringe-worthy, like Magikarp's defenses.

You wanna battle me? You gotta face the consequences.

**Abomasnow:** Calling me weak? Well, you're in NU.

I'll abominally, abdominally, take a crap on you.

All my stats are under 100, but I still got a higher Base then you.

I'll shock you with my skills, like my name was Pikachu.

**Ludicolo: **Think you can win? Well now your time has passed.

I got a bro named Shiftry, he's gonna kick your Grass!

(Shiftry joins the brawl.)

**Shiftry:** You'll be blown away with my mad skills.

You're just a snowman on steroid pills.

Blast you with a razor-sharp Razor Wind.

Shoot you with a charged-up taser, and

Flay you alive, gut you, and eat you.

Burn the bones on the street, man I'll defeat you.

A graveyard is where you'll finally get laid.

'Cause I'll finish you off with my Leaf Blade.

**Abomasnow:** What'd you send to fight me? A white-haired demon?

By the time I finish you all off you'll be screamin'.

I spend hours mopping your remains of the ceiling.

Better run to the Pokemon Center and start healing.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by Heretoch. Thanks, Heretoch, and please keep suggesting battles!


	30. Ash VS Red

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

RED!

VERSUS!

ASH!

BEGIN!

**Red: **I'm a seasoned trainer. I stand alone all day in the cold.

I'm pretty sure that I can beat a hyper ten-year-old.

My Pikachu is ready. He's Level 81.

And unlike yours, he doesn't just fight for fun.

Get ready to have your Pikachu cut to pieces

When my furry partner's Iron Tail unleashes.

Here's a mop to clean up the blood, Ash.

Now go and bike away. Oh wait, you'll just crash.

**Ash:** You can't beat me! I'm very determined!

I'm gonna vanquish this speechless vermin.

Got a Charizard to burn your whole team down.

When this battle's over I'll be wearing the crown.

I've caught 'em all! Well not actually.

I'll give you a head start. Take a Slash at me.

Without me, you'd be nowhere, think about that.

You're more annoying than a cave full of Zubat.

**[Gold flies down.]**

**Gold:** Battles getting outta hand, guess I gotta clean up.

Ash, you're so annoying you could turn Cilan into a grump.

Red, are you retarded bro? You've never said a word in your life.

Let's get this tension so thick I can cut it with a knife.

Johto for the win! Say otherwise it's a sin!

We've got so many Beta 'Mons we needed more than 1 trash bin.

Spinning Top, Kurusu, and Kirinriki are among those scrapped.

You guys have more lies than Team Rocket 'cause you're full of crap.

**[Team Rocket joins the brawl.]**

**Jessie:** Heck no! You just don't mention us like that!

**James: **I'm pretty sure you're the one full of crap.

**Jessie: **You're a waste of air and a waste of time.

**James: **Just like the GS Ball! We'll put an end to your rhymes.

**Jessie: **We've verbally tangled with you and verbally strangled you.

**James: **Now it's time to unleash Meowth! He'll verbally mangle you.

**Meowth: **Don't mess with Team Rocket! Got a veteran here.

Already won a rap battle! You better not come near

Unless you wanna mess with a p*ssed-off cat!

Step to me and get a Scratch attack!

Launching coins in your face like Super Smash Bros. Brawl.

'Bout to give you a Night Slash to the balls.

Not only learned to talk, but also to rap, man.

Bragging's my thing, 'cause I'm as beast as Batman!

**[Batman jumps off a building and lands in front of Meowth.]**

**Batman: **I'M BATMAN, MEOWTH. DON'T MESS WITH ME.

ONLY A FOOL LIKE THE JOKER WOULD STEP TO ME.

GOT A VOICE LIKE A BASS ON STEROIDS.

AND ALSO AS HIGH-TECH AS A SUPERPOWERED ANDROID.

RICHER THAN CHEESECAKE, AND STRONGER THAN FOUR LOKO.

BETTER HEARING THAN A BAT, AND MORE ELEGANT THAN ROCOCO.

THAT'S ME. BATMAN. INTIMIDATED YET?

MORE ROBOTIC AND PSYCHOTIC THAN BOBA FETT.

**[Boba Fett jumps out of the Death Star and lands in front of Batman.]**

**Boba Fett: **Known for my aura of danger and mystery.

Batman, you won't dare to lay a fist on me.

Unaltered clone of a bounty hunter.

My weapons beat a Pokemon's thunder.

79th greatest movie character of all time.

Verbally crushing you all with my epic rhymes.

I'll be riding my Slave 1 all over you. You'll fear me.

You're all about as stupid as the Obamasnow theory.

**[Obama and Abomasnow join the brawl.]**

**Obama: **I can verify the theory's correct, Fett. So shut it.

**Abomasnow: **We'll leave you destroyed, then take your carcass and gut it.

**Obama: **Been running from the press, Boba meat will taste good.

**Abomasnow: **After that, we'll make Boba Tea from your blood.

**Obama: **Red and Ash, stop bragging. You're basically the same person.

**Abomasnow: **We're winning this battle without any mild cursing.

**Obama: **Gotta leave and run the country. Thanks, Abomasnow, my man.

**Abomasnow: **Let's get back on the Pokemon track. This battle's getting outta hand.

**[Gunman Clive jumps down in front of Abomasnow.]**

**Gunman Clive: **Forget Pokemon, let's not let this battle get boring.

Never heard of my game? Then do some eShop exploring.

Gonna shoot you, not verbally, but with my pistol.

Shatter the Abominable Snowman into ice crystals.

Just tryin'a save my girl, fools, back off or get hurt.

You're just collateral damage, so don't get butthurt.

Killed my invincible clone, pretty sure that counts as bad***.

Pokemon is less creative than flippin' Minecraft.

**[An Enderman teleports into the battle.]**

**Enderman: **Over here! No, over here! Gah! Just turn around!

I teleport all over and I'll never be found.

Dropping Ender Pearls, and picking up your blocks.

Clive, you rap like your mouth is full of rocks.

Kill me, and you'll have to deal with Endermites.

But you can't lay a fist on me if I'm outta sight.

Can't you all just make like Smosh and SHUT UP?

You could only get a life if you grabbed a 1-up.

**[Mario swoops down on a winged Yoshi and starts to rap.. in Italian.]**

**Mario: **It's-a-me, Mario! E io sono qui per rap!

Le palle di fuoco di lancio in faccia! Così il male!

Nessuno è probabilmente andando a capire questo.

Quindi mi limiterò a sedersi intorno essere stupido.

O forse blocco di ghiaccio con un fiore! Non aspettatevi!

Vola sopra la testa con un propulsore, inosservato.

Spaventare il crap fuori di voi, e il mio gioco è per i bambini!

Ora tornerò al mio lavoro per fare la pizza .

**[Freddy Fazbear pops out of nowhere.]**

**Freddy: **You want to talk about scary pizza, fat man?

Welcome to my game, I'm more bad*** than Batman.

When my song starts to play, you'll be sweating with fright.

After I scream in your face, you'll never stay up at night.

Even Markiplier and PewDiePie were scared of me.

A game like mine is quite a rarity.

Sorry, Mario, you look like an endoskeleton.

Shove you into a spare suit until you're soft as gelatin.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This mid-season finale took a week to make, but it's finally over. You guys wanted Ash vs. Red, so I gave you Ash vs. Red... vs. Gold vs. Team Rocket vs. Batman vs. Boba Fett vs. Obama and Abomasnow vs. Gunman Clive vs. Enderman vs. Mario vs. Freddy Fazbear.. I'm still going to stick with Pokemon though, this was a one-time thing. New battles in November!


	31. Scyther VS Pinsir

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

SCYTHER!

VERSUS!

PINSIR!

BEGIN!

**Pinsir: **Getcha with a Megahorn, you can't dodge for your life.

Hitcha with a Stone Edge, you'll die, ain't that nice?

Don't need an evolution to be strong, you puny Bug.

Why are you so angry? Mommy forget to give you a hug?

With my type of Defense you don't need a good offense.

But I got one anyway. I'm a 'Mon that makes sense.

I'm a Mold Breakin' Hyper Cutter, here to wreck this mantis.

Won my last rap battle against Heracross.

Got a Pinsirite as some backup, so back up.

Before you start rapping I request you shut the frack up.

I knock you to the floor, spilling all your gore.

You'll be Koffing and Weezing, but you won't be back for more.

Rip off your wings with my razor-sharp claws.

Take off your head with my powerful jaws.

This is the end, my friend. You've been such a pest.

They'll be hunting for your body but their will be nothing left.

**Scyther: **What's that? This flippin' stag beetle just gave me a call?

And speaking of hunting, you need to find a pair of balls.

I'm a Flying-type, but I'm Electric on this mic.

You're just gonna crash, like Ash with a bike.

First gotta chase you, then Aerial Ace you,

Rip your limbs off, and use my blades to deface you.

I'm in Little Cup, but my stats are equal to yours.

I can win without the aid of those big**s horns.

**[Pinsir Mega Evolves!]**

**Mega Pinsir: **Whose Bug and Flying now, you Steadfast freak?

It takes strength to carry horns the size of trees.

Failed to crush you with my pincers so I'll swing you around.

Then tear you in half, you stupid *ss, you're going down.

I've got a built-in Guillotine, meant for beheading crap like you.

You're about as weak as a freaking Pikachu.

You're doubly affected by most of my movepool.

If you're not sweating buckets yet, then you're a flipping fool.

**Scyther: **When I move I only leave a blur. Get on my level.

You think I'm scared of a gargoyle with nonexistent Special?

Look around. You'll only see the afterimage of me.

You just lost the battle against #123.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by Heretoch. Thanks, Heretoch, and please keep suggesting battles!

Several more battles are in the works. Some examples are:

Sceptile VS. Lucario 3 (a collab with ProfessorSOS.)  
Machop VS. Timburr  
Mime Jr. VS. Ditto

Keep updated by following!


	32. Gen 1 VS Gen 5 FT ManWithAnImagination

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON

RED &amp; GREEN!

VERSUS!

BLACK &amp; WHITE!

BEGIN!

**RED**: It's been a long time since we had a battle worthwhile.

**GREEN**: Let's show these amateurs how we rap in the old school style.

**BOTH**: We're the #1 and we can't be touched,

**GREEN: **You best stay away unless you wanna get some.

**RED: **Back in the day were the champions of the world.

**GREEN: **Stronger than the Arceus from Diamond and Pearl.

**RED: **You won't find victory if that's what you seek.

**GREEN: **Why don't you go back home and make out with that green-haired PokeFreak?

**BOTH: **We are the originals; the reason you exist.

**RED: **Your game's so awful, it's as bloated as your Tepig.

**GREEN: **You're nothing but a Magikarp inside an empty barrel,

**RED: **We'll dethrone you from your fame faster than we've done our rival.

**BOTH: **Nobody likes you; you're not worth a single cent.

You're just a worthless faker like your leader Brycen.

**GREEN: **But don't take it too hard,

**RED: **It is a battle, ain't it?

**BOTH: **But now because of you, our entire franchise has been tainted.

**BLACK: **All these futile words are giving me a headache.

**WHITE: **It's time to cut the crap and cut right to the chase.

**BLACK: **Sure you were the first, we can give you that.

**WHITE: **But it's time for to listen to the truth of the facts.

**BOTH: **Winning in our game is an easy simple habit.

Your story is as boring as the Shakespeare's sonnet.

**WHITE: **You call yourself an original with a loser like Green?

**BLACK: **She didn't even exist until generation three.

**BOTH: **That's because what your little "masterpiece" lacks is power.

Unlike you, real fans like to play us hour after hour.

**BLACK: **How did kids even understand how to play your overcomplicated game?

**WHITE: **You have better chance winning jackpot at Team Rocket's hiding place.

**BOTH: **And while your head gym leader was part of some evil master plan,

When our region was in trouble, our gym leaders took a stand.

**WHITE: **Red, you've spent 3 years at the top of some lonely mountain.

**BLACK: **Then got beat down by a hotshot; the downfall of a champion.

**Red: **[steps forward] You don't even know the first thing about strategy.

Games made today are so easy it's a tragedy.

You think you had what takes to be the very best?

Your Elite Four was so easy, I wouldn't even call it a test.

I got some rhymes here to bust, and that's the truth you can trust-

I'll sweep you up like dust, with my Charizard's Gust-

I'm the Pokemon Master's finest- 'cause I'm the light that shines brightest

I battled the most powerful creation of a Pokemon experiment,

while you two just yacked yacked yacked about pointless politics.

We're not afraid of a game that's supposed to hold your hand,

Especially if it's one based on lamps, gears and trash.

**BLACK: **...

**WHITE: **...

**GREEN: **...

**WHITE: **[clears throat] You lecture us about inanimate objects?

**BLACK: **It's time to throw off the gloves and finish these little rejects.

**BOTH: **Yes we got some jammed gears that's about to blow a gasket,

but it's not any different from a floating piece of magnets.

We'll scare you stiff with the lamps that's spits out fireballs-

knocking out your pokeball with Haunter-shaped eyeballs.

**BLACK: **You have a little mole you can only see from the neck and upwards,

**WHITE: **And you don't even wanna know your last Pokémon's name backwards.

**BOTH: **Sure, you were best known for being the underdog,

But you got more glitches than 2006 Sonic the Hedgehog.

**BLACK: **You think you're better than us?

**WHITE: **Man, that's an overstatement.

**BLACK: **Sorry Genwunners,

**BOTH: **But your game is overrated.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

This battle was written by ManWithAnImagination. Please, go check his account out, and maybe follow him.

We've got 50 views until 9000! Once we hit that mark, well, I can make some Dragonball Z jokes.

Of course, counting the Wattpad battles, we have around 15000. So... OVER 9000!

Sorry..


	33. Lucario VS Sceptile 3

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

LUCARIO!

VERSUS!

SCEPTILE!

BEGIN!

**Lucario: **I'm determined I can beat this lizard for the third time,

I'll bust out my close combat like I bust out a rhyme,

I'm gonna tear your leafy body, piece by piece,

'Cause you'll get KOed, when I let my Metal Claw unleash!

You can worry, you're not in the swamp no longer!

I'm sure we'll all know in the end, who's really stronger,

Why am I battling this lost cause?

It takes me three battles to list all your flaws,

Stepped to me again, and still, I remain undefeated!

'Cause my lyrics have been severely depleted…

**Sceptile:** Bro, I dunno if you're on speed or crack

But I'll win this battle with an attack to the sack.

Use your futile Aura Sphere, it'll bounce right off.

I've said this before, but you're just a metal goth.

Your tears will be flowing just like my rhymes.

But stepping to me means you've crossed the line.

So BACK OFF! Unless you want your gore,

Splattered, battered, and scattered all over the floor.

**Lucario: **I'm pretty sure that we all know who's coming to win,

This Lucario sensation's at it again.

I'll Aura Sphere you, although you're affected by my charm,

You're stuck in Little League, a Magikarp could leave you harmed.

'Cause all you do is spend your days, camouflaged in the forest,

But you're sure to get "burned" when I spit this death chorus.

I'll use 'Extreme Speed' around you, you stand there awe struck.

You should stick to Gulpin, because your types of raps suck!

**Sceptile: **Your name may rhyme with Mario, but you still can't handle power.

And you couldn't burn me if you found that flower.

You look like you downed a tub of bath salts, freak.

You now know not to step to me if it's a fair battle you seek.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

Aidanator wrote Lucario's lines for this battle, so go check him out. And leave your suggestions in the reviews. Thanks!


	34. Castform VS Mime Jr

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

MIME JR.!

VERSUS!

CASTFORM!

BEGIN!

**Castform:** I've predicted who will win this battle with a Forecast.

It'll be me; hit you with Blizzard, Hydro Pump and Fire Blast.

Fighting in any kind of weather, be it sunny, rain or hail.

And I've come to this rap fight just to watch you fail.

You express your ideas with your actions; how you gonna busta rhyme?

Honestly, no one would use a prevolution of a mime.

But a genetic marvel like me? It's pretty cool to rock one of those.

Transforming into different 'mons to wreck all of my foes.

**Mime Jr.:** I'm done acting in character, looks like I'll have to speak

To destroy this phantom with boobs hanging out, looking like a freak.

Dude, I don't see why Game Freak thought you were RSE worthy.

No one's even heard of you; and that design just looks dirty.

Go morph already; I'm too young to see a flash like that.

Or maybe you're slipping me the balls? Whatever. I'll just start my rap.

70 in each stat; 420 total.

Might have many different forms, but you couldn't KO a Floatzel.

Your only purpose is to prove that artificial Pokemon suck.

Don't have any legs, but you still stepped to me; well now you're out of luck.

Let me show you a Trick; I'll Focus Punch you in the d**k.

Are the lumps even testicles? What the frick?

It's supposedly the weather that causes you to Transform

But how come nothing happens when a battler uses Sandstorm?

No one uses your *ss. You're just a friggin' gimmick.

Not even worthy of one little Mimic!

**Castform: **A verse full of d**k jokes. Very original.

I can see why they call you Junior; because you're so immature.

These bumps are just bumps. Your guesses? None right.

Now let's watch what happens in the sunlight.

[Castform transforms.]

**Sunny Day Castform: **Now I'm spitting static like I'm hooked up to a generator.

I'm made of fire, just call me The Incinerator.

A prepubescent clown isn't worth a fight.

Now go and drop your balls like I drop the mic.

**Mime Jr.:** You wanna mention balls? Don't get me started.

We'll call you Red C, 'cause your chest just parted.

**Sunny Day Castform: **Life must suck for you when your nose looks like a turd.

No wonder I'm a Fire-type, because you just got burned!

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!


	35. Gold VS Nate (Gen 2 VS BlackWhite 2)

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

GOLD!

VERSUS!

NATE!

BEGIN!

**Nate: **I'm fighting against a revamped, crappy sequel

But my game was so amazing that there is no equal.

Sloppy seconds was all that Johto had to offer

Along with this twisted metal version of Harry Potter.

You've got more filler than I have bridges

I'm cycling around picking up all my b****es

While you're just trying to avoid glitches

This kid's too big for his britches!

Come on mate. What kind of force do you think you command?

You're gonna lose our battle, so you'd better have your cash in hand.

Stop running around catching bugs, you frickin' emo druggie.

Because you're always gonna lose to that kid with the Caterpie.

Things are going to get Dark 'cause it's the win I'm gonna Steel.

When you step to Black 2, things start to get real.

Go back to your Trainer House to get screwed up beyond repair.

I guess we'll call you Bidoof, because you're Simple, Moody, Unaware.

**Gold: **Why do I have to compete with this shaggy haired jock?

His chances are like trying to score women like the gym leader Brock.

Now don't get me mixed up as just another random sequel,

After I single handedly tore up the root of all evil.

The flames of your defeat will soon be ignited,

When I break through the 4th wall like Lance's level 50 Dragonite.

Your journey's filled with nothing but a dull simple mission,

Then in the end your Elite Four will bow down in submission.

Your existence in this battle will hardly ever matter,

Because you're only just as good Joey's top percentage Ratatta.

As my rhymes get hotter, your victory moves farther-

when my partner Typhlosion gets into his prime time motion.

My insults hit you harder, so why do you even bother-

when you get the inside notion your dignity's been pried open.

I'm chopping and eating your rhymes like a Slowpoke's tail,

And soon you'll be the first ever human to learn the move Flail.

**Nate: **Weak and easily-defeated are the obstacles you hurdle

Whereas the battles I must face would make your blood curdle.

Gold? You sound like a crappy white rapper trying to compete!

Wait, that's exactly what you are.. So back off, kid, and take a seat.

I'm not going to be beaten by some chump on the Game Boy Color

Who's gay and bad with money so he gives it to his mother.

Your game's only bigger than mine if we're talking cartridge size.

I'm out! Black 2 has just caused your demise.

**Gold: **I'm the closest to perfection this franchise had ever seen!

While your greatest major flaw was when you could surf inside a tree!

You're just another shallow trainer who's friends with a Qwilfish-

While the champion stood back in awe of my superior battle skills.

16 badges is an accomplishment you'll never ever make,

I can easily crack you open like the opening daybreak.

I defeated the most powerful trainer which no one had ever done-

And that is what truly makes me the best who ever was.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

Credit for Gold's verses go to ManWithAnImagination. Go check out his profile. And keep on suggesting battles.


	36. Serena VS May

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

MAY!

VERSUS!

SERENA!

BEGIN!

**Serena**: Just so things are clear, before I make you disappear,

I'm no pushover- I won't go down, not by some geek from Littleroot Town.

I've confronted life and death, and didn't even break a sweat.

Go home now; this fight is mine, your lines will deteriorate faster than your Brine.

Sure your game has gotten a 3DS remake,

But out of all bad games, yours takes the cake.

Although to you, I applaud and cry out bravo!

For having the worst fashion design than John Galliano.

It took you 3 seasons to become a decent trainer,

And act like it's the end of the world when someone takes your food off the platter.

You dared to travel the region with my soul mate, Ash.

So make like a Magikarp and prepare to be trashed.

**May: **All this crap you've got against me is from the anime.

You might want to try the games before you step to May!

My game is bad? It's home to critical acclaim!

While all this Kalos s*** does is give our franchise a bad name.

I'm the master of contests, while you can't even do them.

And every time you battle me my skill keeps improving.

You've always got the same Pokemon on your POS team!

I'm deadly when I spit, while all you are is serene.

**Serena: **How could you brag about your mega evolutions?

Since we were the ones who had the idea introduced it.

Sure, our new Fairy type didn't make a big difference,

But with all of your "Legendaries", Masterballs are irrelevant.

When this battle is over, Yveltal will be the one to take you.

But as of now, your butt just got a good taste of my shoe.

**May: **At least I'm not just another one of Ash's wh*res!

I keep it hardcore with my powerful Wailord.

Stop screaming, please, I don't like your attitude.

My remakes saved your generation so show some gratitude.

It's now obvious that all your confidence has faded

Can't you just realize your crappy game is overrated?

I'm done clashing rhymes against this fashion freak, you've been such a bother.

You think you're the queen of Pokemon? At least I have a father.

**Serena: **...

**May: **... I'm sorry.

**Serena:** No, it's alright.

**May: **I went a little too far on that one...

**Serena: **It happens to the best of us.

**May: **...

**Serena: **...

**May: **You want to go shove Brendan's head down a toilet?

**Serena** ...heck yeah! Let's go!

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

Next battle is Greninja VS. Swampert. I've been working on it for ages so hopefully it won't be a let-down.

Credit for Serena's lines goes to ManWithAnImagination. We may need some help for the finale, so if you want to write a verse or two, PM me.


	37. Greninja VS Swampert

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF POKEMON!

GRENINJA!

VERSUS!

SWAMPERT!

BEGIN!

**Swampert: **Who will win this clash of wills? Why, the expert of the swamp!

Lyrically impale you, and finish with a curb stomp.

I shouldn't lay out my plan before I've put it in action.

Wouldn't want to give this excuse for a ninja any traction.

That tongue scarf is obscene! You should have stayed a Frogadier.

Nobody gives a d*mn if you're in a higher tier.

You got two signature moves? Well, that's great!

But your lousy Defenses are nothing to Celebrate.

Mat Block this, you foul pond creature.

I don't even need to Mega Evolve to wreck and beat you.

Going HAM on this pig, with my fists of destruction.

Too bad surviving a hit isn't one of your functions.

Make the ground shake with a beastly Earthquake.

You don't stand a chance! Bow out for Arceus' sake!

I evolve from Mudkip. You'd better liek that.

Or else I'll kill you with one move, due to my unrivaled Attack.

**Greninja: **Whoa, man. Calm down. No need to scream.

You need to chill out, here, taste my Ice Beam.

Constantly changing types, thanks to Protean.

I can dodge all your attacks, no need for Reflect or Light Screen.

I take priority with a powerful Water Shuriken.

You doubt that I can beat you? Well, I say, sure I can!

Man, I'm just toying with you. Look at my entry in the PokeDex.

My ninja stars are sharp! Now I'll hit you with a Water Pledge.

{Greninja uses Water Pledge. Blastoise comes bursting out of the water.}

**Blastoise: **Give it a break, Greninja. This isn't Need For Speed.

And Swampert, you looked like you just smoked a bag of weed.

Sure, I may be slow, but who gives a crap?

I'll show you d**chebags Speed when I come to rap.

Bash your Skulls 'til your amphibian heads crack open.

I'll hit you with my spinning shell, got the force of a truck.

With these weak Pokemon I'm no longer coping.

My strength makes even the Elite Four utter "Holy.."

{Blastoise is cut off by Samurott.}

**Samurott: **Blastoise, quit flapping that misshapen jaw.

Better hide in your shell, or you're gonna get mauled.

You talk tough, but when I spit, you back away, you b*st*rd.

Your Defenses can't compare to the sword skills I've mastered.

Samurott slices sackless s**ts into bits with a sword.

Got the strength of a samurai and the speed of an otter.

You'll all be gobbled up when you step into territory of Wailord

Because all of the Sharpedo will smell your blood in the water.

In the time it takes you to blink, you'll be shanked by my katanas.

Smear your names on the wall, with your blood, in katakana.

Read my entry, you buffoons will be quieted with my glare.

Open your mouth one more time, and literally taste an Aqua Tail.

My verse is the longest there's been yet, proving I'm the greatest rhymer.

None of you can compare, not to me, probably not even a Grimer.

All you insecure morons bragging about your skills, then BAM

I came and heated up this battle like my name was Reshiram.

**Greninja: **Let me stop you right there. Your raps were worse than all of ours.

**Swampert: **You just got burned like you were facing a Charizard.

**Blastoise: **Acting all superior, you don't even have a Mega.

And you get pwned by a Serperior, while I'm underrated as Sega.

**Samurott: **So in other words you're not underrated at all?

**Blastoise:** ...

**Samurott: **...

**Blastoise: **You're not making any sense right now.

{Feraligatr joins the brawl.}

**Feraligatr: **I don't get the concept of these new-fangled features.

What the h*ll is a Mega? Is it a Pokemon creature?

Keep it simple. We don't need keyrings and anthro-whatchamacallit ice cream.

Just the idea of your ridiculous designs makes me wanna scream!

**Greninja: **No.. Just no.

**Feraligatr: **Sorry. I'm just really sleep-deprived.

{Empoleon cuts in.}

**Empoleon: **Guess I gotta end this crap, it's getting out of control.

I'm striving to win this battle, and with two lines I met my goal.

I'm a tyrant, 5'7" like the real Napoleon.

But I'm made of metal, which makes me the bad*ss Empoleon.

Swampert, you're all brains and no brawn, so screw you.

Greninja, I'll show you what a real Smasher can do.

All the rest of you, calm your t*ts, what's the big deal?

I just Scalded all of you. Anyone need a Burn Heal?

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

This battle was suggested by xXZyroGaming69Xx. Thanks, xXZyroGaming69Xx, this battle was really fun to make.


End file.
